[ It really should be enough to shut him up for a time, but it isnāt. Eddie allows himself to be guided for a time, genuinely enjoying the warm weight of the hand on the back of his neck and he hums low in the back of his throat around Gatorās cock, encourages his thrusting even if it means hell for his own gag reflect. But when he thinks Gator is close to finishing, he pull off of him, chest heaving and a touch of laughter in his throat. He already looks half a mess, eyes watering and cheeks flushed, wiping saliva from his chin with the back of his hand, but thereās clearly still a good measure of wickedness there as he pulls back, teases, does everything he can to be a brat. ]
You sound like a man obsessed already, sweetheart. A small time dealer really has you this hot and bothered?
[ His accusation comes paired with a smirk and a dark chuckle as he rests his cheek against Gatorās thigh and peers up at him with those wide eyes, looking almost sweet of a moment. He thinks he could try it, though. Take that wad of cash and see how far he can coast before it all runs dry and he has to turn back or figure out something else. There really isnāt much for him to lose at this point, and the thought of of finally getting out is appealing in and of itself, but what really puts it over the edge is the tempting threat of being chased. Itās about seven different shades of fucked up how readily he think heād welcome it and how deeply he wants to challenge him on it just to give him a nudge in the right direction. Because the cruel, hard look in his eyes and the way he lifts Eddieās chin to meet his gazeāEddie believes heād do it, given enough encouragement.
All Eddie was really aiming for tonight was one less noise complaint on his record and the police off his back for a single evening. Heād wanted Gator Tillman in and out of his home as quickly as possible, but now things have twisted rather dramatically and here he is on his knees, palming himself while he willingly sucks that very same man off. Even worse, Eddie is sure heāll do just about anything to chase this high again when itās all over. He canāt phrase why and heās not even sure he wants to understand what was unlocked in him tonight. All he can do is acknowledge that the two of them have walked hand in hand into the lionās den and the exit has been sealed. They are both well and truly, completely and utterly fucked.
And the worst part is just how fine he is with that. He feels fully insane. ]
Butā
[ He begins, raising his head. He licks his lips and chooses to take pity on him, repositioning to take him in his mouth once more. He wants so badly to hear him hiss and moan again, and he scrapes his short nails down his thigh, leaving white marks as he swirls his tongue over the tip, eye contact still unbroken. ]
Iād really like to see you try.
[ There it is. A challenge, emphasis on the really, clearly containing more than a crumb of truth. Eddie would very much like to see him try. ]
[ gator is close, and when eddie pulls off - he grunts, hand at the back of his head tightening as he takes in a sharp breath. his mouth is open; fat-tongued due to the weed, the pleasure still rocking through his pelvis. he thrusts up, trying to get back at eddie's mouth, a groan of frustration and a slight whine as eddie denies him. he speaks, and gator's eyes light up, that cruel streak rearing its head. he slips his hand around eddie's neck, wrapping his fingers around his throat. he doesn't squeeze, but the eye contact he's holding means he doesn't have to. he'd never have to. ]
You think I won't chase your ass down? Ain't nothin' I can't do. Is that it?
[ when eddie takes mercy and slips the head of gator's cock back into his mouth, gator pants, the sensation of eddie's nails sending him over the edge. he rocks his hips, hand now in eddie's hair as he rides it out. again, he pulls off, and gator groans, so frustrated that he swallows thickly. he wants to come. he knows he's eddie's plaything for now, and that both turns him on and makes him incredibly angry. what about this little burnout does it for him? those eyes, maybe. that ass in those jeans, again, maybe. gator grabs a handful of eddie's hair, ripping his head back, before he leans down and kisses him. he can taste himself, taste cock, but that doesn't bother him, never has. ]
What'cha want, huh? Me to admit somethin'? You think I won't tax that ass like it owes me money? You think I won't ruin you for anyone else?
[ he backs away, hand still in eddie's hair, and he stares down at him. cold, calculating, but glassy-eyed from lust and substances. he takes in a breath, steadying. ]
[ Itās a shock it took this long to end up with Gatorās hand around his throat, and it might have even be enough to shake Eddie out of this substance and lust-induced daze in an instant if he had actually tightened his grip. But he doesnāt, and although Eddieās heart gives a little jolt of terror, it calms almost immediately as he somehow comes to the conclusion that he wonāt. He does wonder vaguely if heās an idiot for letting this spiral so massively out of hand. After all, that cruel look in Gatorās eye is enough of a reminder that Eddie still doesnāt trust him, canāt trust him by any means, but thereās still a high that heās chasing, and heās not ready to come down yet.
The noise he emits when his hair is given a strong tug is interestingāa soft yelp mixed with a moan, all smothered in an instant beneath that kiss. He all but melts into it and swears quietly when they part. ]
Jesus Christ. [ He rolls his head backward into Gatorās palm, buying a moment to catch his breath by staring up into his cold gaze. ] Putting words in my mouth. Pretty sure I only said Iād like to see you try, not that I didn't think you could.
[ Then Eddieās gaze drops downward, flicks upward, downward, then up again. He eyes Gator doubtfully, scrunches up his face and tilts his head one way, then the other, and itās more than clear that heās trying to figure out how all of that could possibly fit inside of him. But the scales tip rather quickly in favor of his want and desire, and he literally shrugs his concerns off, clambers to his feet, and slips through the door of one incredibly messy bedroom.
The sounds of opening and closing drawers, murmured swears and rusting come from within and moments later, Eddie makes his triumphant return, bottle in hand and stripped down to just torn denim and skin. Thereās really nothing particularly impressive or remarkable about what lies beneath his uniform of faded band tees, and heās well aware of that fact. Heās still very much a skinny burnout who probably canāt afford to miss a meal, more sinew and poorly etched tattoos than muscle, but he isnāt lacking in an ounce of confidence as he approaches Gator once more.
Without missing a beat, he drops the bottle onto the couch, then drops himself down onto Gatorās lap to straddle him. He buries his fingers deep into the gel-slicked hair and crowds in painfully close to kiss him like his very life depends on it. Slow, deep, and open mouthed, pouring every ounce of his longing and hunger into it, teeth and tongue and the taste of weed and beer.
Pulling back slightly, he continues in a murmur: ]
But I can guarantee you itās not gonna be you who ruins me for anyone else.
[ He very much could, likely will, probably already has considering how much Eddie wants this. But if this is what fate has in store for him, he plans on dragging Gator down with him. Make him just as desperate and needy and addicted as Eddie already is so they can keep one another company in this personal hell theyāve just created.
His voice is low and touched with gravel as he leans in close, breath hot against Gatorās ear, teeth just scraping against the shell of it. ]
Itās gonna be me who ruins anyone else for you, deputy. No one else is gonna do it for you after this.
[ eddie's head rides back, into gator's palm, and gator tugs it again, possessive. he slips his hand down to the back of eddie's neck, thumb reaching to caress his adam's apple. he swallows hard, and he can't believe this is fucking happening. he's about to pound the brains out of eddie munson.
it seems comical, near-funny, but there's too much lust between them that gator denies the idea that this might be something he won't come back from. if the sex is good, and gator predicts it will be, maybe he'll be the one coming back like an addict ready for the biggest hit imaginable. he wants to overdose on eddie's couch like this, thrusting up into him and coming so hard he'll taste it.
eddie shrugs, leaves the room, and gator peels out of his t-shirt, tossing it to the side. he works the cammo pants down, gun still in its holster, and around his ankles. he takes his cock in his hand, working it, keeping stiff.
he grunts, moan desperate to escape, but he knows that he won't come like this. he can't. it's not enough. still palming himself, eddie re-enters the room shirtless. he's a streak of nothing, skinny and hungry, but gator's starving mouth devours his all the same. his hands travel over eddie's back as they kiss, then over tattoos and his abdomen, rubbing down between his legs. his cock is hard, and gator grunts, knowing that soon he'll jerk it to leaking. ]
Is that right?
[ his words cause gator to shiver, eyes fluttering closed as eddie mouths at his ear. a sensitive spot, gator's cock twitching at the head. his hips shift against eddie's, their pelvises grinding, shaft to shaft. gator moans, lifting eddie effortlessly and bringing him closer. he rips down the rest of the denim, hands on eddie's ass, kneading. ]
That's it, baby. Want me to stretch you out first, huh? How much can you take?
[ it's almost as if he cares - almost. he doesn't want to hurt eddie that badly, does he? the urge to pin him to the floor and fuck him into oblivion like he wants to is tempting, caring about his own pleasure. however, he doesn't, hand around eddie to stroke him. it's slow and teasing, free fingers at eddie's hole. he touches it, rings around the rim, eyes on eddie's all the same. dark, curious, dangerous. ]
Look at it.
[ he grabs eddie's chin, jerking his head down, but gently. he's touching eddie still, lazy jerks, his own cock rubbing against his. ]
[ Itās certainly not the night Eddie envisioned for himself. Not even close, but something in him totally flipped after that second joint and oddly enough, heās not even that high. Heās been stoned fully out of his mind before, and this is nothing like that. The weed barely even factors into it, just offers a good method to excuse this all away later if need be. Heās high on something else entirely, borderline euphoric and so hard it hurts, and in desperate need of more. It's true junkie behavior, and just may be a better buzz than heās gotten from literally anything else in his life.
Maybe heāll have it in him to laugh about it later, because the shift this night took really is all kinds of hilarious. Or maybe heāll just crave it until it happens again, which it inevitably will. Theyāve well established that, even if neither has has properly admitted it. Eddieās reaction serves as truth enough, though. The way his breath hitches in his throat and he swears airily, head tipping to the side, his eyelids fluttering shut as his fingers scrape and grip at any skin they can dig into. The way he bites his lip and shifts, greedily trying to chase the wave of pleasure. And, of course, the fact that he does absolutely nothing to stop him or push him away. ]
Shit, I take it back. That is pretty gentleman behavior of you.
[ Because it really is a level ofā¦maybe care isnāt the correct word, but consideration that he didnāt expect from Gator Tillman, even after his opinion of the man has been significantly twisted already. Heās not expecting a particularly large amount of tenderness, but heās willing to do just about anything to chase this high, and heās certainly not put off now.
He huffs out a soft laugh against Gatorās hand, seriously considers saying something smart like not really or I donāt know, roll for initiative first just to fuck with him, but he thinks better of it. When youāre naked in another manās lap and his hand is around your cock, pretense becomes just a little ridiculous, even if it is for the sake of a joke.
So he sheds pretense entirely and makes things quite clear when he lifts his eyes to that dark, dangerous gaze, tilts his head, and responds with a sly smile, knowing full well that he isn't the only one who desperately wants this. ]
[ the lubricant is easy enough to open; a flip of gator's thumb and he's squirting a healthy amount into his palm. he tosses it aside, sticky-coated fingers warming it between his hands. he glances at eddie, dark eyes lit up, before he reaches around and begins to play with his entrance again. slow circles, a few taps, then he finally slides his middle in, joined by his index. he groans, the warmth so good on just his fingers alone, the tightness and heat intoxicating in its own way. he's going to fuck this skinny burnout, whether or not that's what he came for. he knew that it might happen eventually, but so soon? it's a wet dream come true.
gator pumps his fingers, not too fast, but enough to begin to stretch the muscle. he bites his lip, free hand now back on he and eddie, stroking together. wet, slick sounds make gator gasp, his head leaned back against the sofa's headrest as he eyes eddie's face. all of those expressions, all of that pleasure. he grabs eddie's hip, pulling him forward and into another hot, hard kiss. he mouths at eddie's bottom lip. ]
Mmhm, maybe don't judge a book by it's fuckin' cover. Open up real wide for me, baby boy. Let me feel it.
[ he can see a twist of the light in eddie's eyes, as if he's about to challenge him. gator bites eddie's chin, a grin around the skin, before he leans off and kisses him again, again, again. his fingers slide in and out, quicker, breath hot on eddie's neck. ]
C'mon, say it. I can see that smartass mind flippin' around.
[ gator's lips part in a dark, breathless chuckle. he holds eddie onto him, blunt cockhead rubbing against his still, and he can't take it. he'll need him soon, really soon, but first - gator needs to be pushed over the edge. he wants eddie to smart off, to piss him off, to say something eddie enough to get his blood boiling. call it gator's sick foreplay, or call it the urge to be challenged. ]
[ Itās all Eddie can do to quiver and groan as heat pools between his legs and his mind runs wild with all his wants. Wants the hand on his hip to grip hard enough to bruise, wants to leave marks of his own, wants more and often. Itās kind of ridiculous, but itās so hot and theyāre impossibly close and thoughts beyond lust and desire donāt come easily.
His vision swims as he digs his nails into flesh, mouth falling open in a gasp as they kiss again, and again, and again. Itās not enough. Heās a man starved, and he tries his hardest to chase down one more kiss despite already being so overtaken by pleasure he could die from it.
Then the entire thing is denied, put on a brief pause because Eddie even thought about trying to fuck with him, and since when is Gator Tillman a mind reader? He groans loudly, partially out of arousal and partially out of frustration. ]
That just means you aināt getting none til I do. Funny how that works, huh?
[ He talks a big talk, mimics Gatorās lingo just for an added layer of impudence. And ordinarily heād be perfectly happy to pull back entirely, to tease, to keep this dance going until it drives Gator right to the edge of insanity, but that just isnāt in the cards tonight. Call him dramatic, but Eddie isnāt sure heāll survive if they donāt see this through, not when heās coming apart at the seams as they speak. ]
I was just thinkingā
[ His head lolls backwards, baring the column of his throat as he half chuckles, half huffs angrily. ]
That given our current position? It was a stupid question to ask, deputy.
[ Just as quickly, his chuckle snaps into a soft whine of oh, fuck, his head dropping low and a curtain of hair falling across his face as he rocks back onto Gatorās hand. In this state, he struggles to keep his usual string of jokes and smartass banter going, and he stutters in an attempt to continue. ]
But I am way too close and if you donāt shut up and get to defiling me, this is gonna be over real quick.
[ now that's better. gator slips his fingers out slowly, but doesn't hold back when he thrusts his hips. a hard, rough push and he's inside, a groan of approval escaping his lips as he leans forward and sucks on the side of eddie's neck, opposite, teeth pulling the flesh to kiss another bruise. he groans, hot breath on eddie's ear as he holds him down by the pelvis with two strong hands. he kisses his chin, then covers his mouth with his own, kissing him deep and with lustful, covetous intent. he knows that this is bad - beyond bad, the both of them already this close without trying. has it always been this way? has there always been a spark since gator laid eyes on him? maybe, maybe not. substances add to that, layer by intoxicating layer, gator's hips snapping upward. ]
Defilin'... that what you like to call it, darlin'?
[ gator's words are cut while he moans, lazy syllables in and out of needy sighs. he fucks eddie like he means it, and he does, leaning back to watch as he bounces him into his lap. his thumbs dig into eddie's hipbones, and gator bites his lip, eyes roving over eddie as if he's a man lost, a man that needs to eat him whole. he feels good, almost too good, gator's cockhead tapping his prostate with precision as he angles his hips to catch more of it. ]
You're so fuckin' hard, babydoll, let me help -
[ gator raises his hand and spits in it, then wraps his palm around eddie, pulling, stroking. he matches his own pace, despite his hips jumping quicker. he grunts, looking up at eddie as if this isn't going to be the last time, and they both know it. not when eddie is this tight and feels so good. he yanks his hair back, sitting up again, cock driving into eddie shallowly as he huffs against his mouth. ]
[ It all happens so hard and fast that thereās absolutely no time to make one last quip. Thereās no time to catch his breath or to think or to request that Gator to slow down and give him one fucking secondāas if he possibly would at this point. Heās far too stubborn and in entirely too deep to even think of making such a request. All that single beat of time allows for is a soft, strangled cry as he scrambles for purchase and stars burst before his eyes.
But itās all to be expected. If he wanted tenderness, Gator is the very last person heād be doing this with. This is a quiet desire thatās worked its way up to a mighty need at any cost. Addiction at its finest; anything for a hit, no matter how quick or dirty. And maybe that spark wasnāt alway there, but there was an ember, something so small and insignificant that it could be extinguished with a single breathāor, under different circumstances, stoked into a roaring flame. The latter clearly where theyāve ended up, and it just seems like the natural conclusion for their little dance. The time spent circling one another, closing in little by little, they were alway going to collide eventually, one way or another.
But after that awkward start, Eddie finds a rhythm to match Gatorās, and heās not quiet. A never-ending stream of moans, sighs, and breathless fuck, yeses and please, please, pleases tumbles from his lips as he moves his hips in tandem with Gatorās thrusts. Itās the most polite heās ever been, really.
He accuses Gator of being obsessed, but Eddie is no better. As enraptured as he is and as incredible as heās feeling, he refuses to let his eyes shut. Instead, he keeps his gaze fixed on Gator whenever he can, dark and intense as ever, drinking in every shift in expression and hitch in his breath, hoping to hold him there for as long as possible. ]
Iām soāIām so fucking close.
[ He rasps and chuckles breathlessly, and he thinks about how much he would love to draw this out even more, love to figure out how much it takes to make this man fucking beg for more, but Eddieās already been thoroughly unravelled and itās just a little too late for that now. He silently vows that next time, he will. Next timeāitās an inevitability now, isnāt it?
He twists away from the grip on his hair, just enough to kiss him once more, hard enough to bruise. ]
You gonna get me there, sweetheart? Bet you can't.
[ gator wraps one of his arms around eddie's waist, settling him, the start of it all sloppy and fast. he grunts, shifting eddie forward, his pace punishing. he thrusts up, hand still covering eddie's cock, palm warm and slick as he teases the head with the flat pad of his thumb. they kiss, and gator gives as good as he gets, mouthing at eddie and biting his bottom lip.
he pulls him closer, chest to chest, the way the couch groans underneath them as if it's about to break - it pushes gator further toward the edge, his cock twitching inside of eddie as he begins to leak. he kisses down eddie's chin, then his jawline, biting at it, too. he wants to swallow him whole, wants to take him and never let him go. this, this, this.
with another groan, he tears his head away from eddie's neck, tongue licking upward to the shell of his ear. he grunts again, the thrusts becoming harder, deeper. gator pants, and a whine exits, enough for him to look almost helpless. his mouth parts, wet, shiny, each moan more and more desperate. ]
That's it, baby. Don't think I can fuck you good?
[ his hand moves faster, mouth on eddie's again. he kisses him with fire - passion and pain and tearing eddie up from the inside. his pelvis jerks wildly, and as he leans back onto the cushions, his back arches. he pants louder, looking at eddie, into his eyes, before he spits in his hand again. he coaxes precome from eddie's slit with two fingers, groaning at the sight of it. ]
C'mon, let me see that spunk. Come all over me. I fuckin' need it.
[ his eyelids flutter, and another moan crawls from deep, coming out harsh and so close - ]
[ All according to plan. Itās more than clear that Eddie is just trying to egg him on, trying to see how much more he can put into it, and heās not disappointed when Gatorās pace picks up. Itās pleasure tinged with pain and heās sure heāll end up bruised and feeling it for days, but he canāt focus on anything but the feeling and the movement beneath him right now, and the way he knows heāll end up chasing a repeat of this again and again and again. He drinks in every kiss and bite snd mourns the loss of Gatorās mouth on his own hen he pulls away, forever desperately for more. ]
Fuckā [ He shakes his head, another chuckle edging into his breath, like he just canāt help but laugh his way through this. Itās all so ridiculous, itās all just so much, Gator threatening to finish inside of him while the couch creaks dangerously beneath them, and he just hopes this doesnāt result in anything that he needs to awkwardly explain away later. ] Donāt care. Do it. Fucking need you to do it, okay?
[ He should give more of a shit, there should be more caution than heās actually putting in here, but itās too late for all of that. A problem for future Eddie to dwell on. Preset Eddie is desperate and urgent as the heat builds, and itās all so fucking fast but absolutely incredible as Eddie fights to close any space that remains between them. He presses close, chest to chest, thigh to thigh, and comes with his face in the crook of Gatorās neck, with a shudder and a ragged groan. ]
[ gator thrusts upward, faster, faster - he comes inside of eddie, shooting warmth and wet stickiness. he growls, low and breathless against eddie's ear as he feels him lose it against his chest. he tilts his chin, taking eddie's mouth with his own to kiss - slow, deep, lazy. the afterglow takes hold of gator as he pumps a few more inches into eddie, hands on his hips guiding them through their shared orgasm. gator kisses him again, pulling him closer. aftercare is just as good, gator kneading eddie's ass. ]
That's it, baby. Was it good?
[ he kisses eddie's forehead, brushing wild hair away from it. sweat and come fill the room with the stink of sex, lubricant sticky on their thighs. gator leans his head back, eyes closed, hands now resting on either side of eddie's hips. they stay like this for a moment, gator catching his breath, still half-hard. he's inside, settled, the white of it leaking onto both of them. it's messy, nasty, but gator feels satisfied... for the moment. he knows that he'll be back for this, he'll be back to fuck and smoke and fuck and smoke - but for the while, this is enough. ]
Don't tell anyone about this shit.
[ that should be evident, but the way he's stroking eddie's spine now is downright soft. he hates himself for it, but eddie's just about left him in a coma. that deserves some kindness, he figures, the skinny streak of nothing in his arms warm and soft and needed after. he kisses eddie's cheek, then leans his head back again, coated in both of them. ]
[ His brain and mouth havenāt quite figured out how to work in tandem again yet and he nods weakly, docile and pliable enough for the time being to leave his stubbornness by the wayside and tell the truth of it. It was good, a better high than anything stashed in his bedroom could possibly ever provide. Heās thoroughly satisfied, and the only problem is that he knows he was right: once isnāt enough.
With absolutely no regard for the mess between them, he slumps against Gator like a rag doll and just stays there for a moment, quiet as his heartbeat and breath match the pace of Gatorāsāone beat, two, three, fourā¦Itās the soft aftermath that pulls him back down to earth, the gentle touch on his spine so foreign from these particular hands that it slowly begins pulling on his tether, drawing him out of his stupor. Slowly, his raises his head, blinking in the dim light. ]
And here I was so eager to let everyone know Iām a cop fucker.
[ Thereās no heat to it, and he mumbles, deadpan, still coming out of his haze. He doesnāt particularly care about Tillman Sr. right now, even if he is significantly more intimidating than his son. Heās not here, and there were never any plans to utter a single word about this to anyone. Eddie doesnāt feel a lot of shame aboutā¦well, anything, to be perfectly honest, but heās not stupid. There are some things best kept quiet, and this is certainly one of them. ]
Donāt worry about it, ākay?
[ He brushes the askew hair back and kisses him once, impossibly sweet. ]
[ the nodding, the sighing, the kissing: gator tillman is a dead man, and it won't be a bullet from his father's gun that blows his brains out. it'll be this... strange, soft, sweet tenderness that didn't exist not an hour ago. call it afterglow, call it his dick getting wet - he kisses eddie back so slowly, so deliberately, biting into his bottom lip and sucking it gently. all gator can manage is mmhm, kissing eddie's jaw. yeah, he's a dead man, alright. ]
Cop fucker, yeah, you sure are.
[ a grin, a little bounce of his lap to make sure eddie knows he's still inside him. he's not mean, he's not cruel, he's simply existing at the arms of something he's feeling attracted to. it's a warmth, and he hates it just as much as he wants to burn himself against it. he should be feeling nausea and anxiety and regret and pain - but here he is, eddie munson on his lap, their naked bodies fitting so fucking perfectly. ]
I ain't gonna so long as -
[ they're kissing, and gator groans again, cupping eddie's face by his cheeks and mouthing at him. ]
- we just keep it a fuckin' secret. He ain't gotta know. This is just you and me. It ain't gotta make it around town.
[ gator stares at eddie, searching his eyes with his own. they're sharper now, more in-focus. he tilts his head, swallowing stiffly, then releases his gentle hold. he leans back against the cushions, hand on eddie's hip. they're still naked and entangled, but gator begins to feel the stickiness of it all. he winces, then gazes up at eddie with a slight pout. ]
[ Maybe itās just the afterglow and the fact that heās feeling satisfied and warm and content, maybe itās the fact that every kiss is painfully sweet and gentle and it takes everything for him to not just melt into each one, but he feels the need to soothe that worry. Maybe an anxious man just has the innate ability to recognize anxiety, no matter how deeply buried it may be. He murmurs against Gatorās mouth as they kiss, voice soft: ]
Heās not gonna know. No oneās gonna know. Iām not exactly in the business of oversharing, soā¦
[ His gaze is so open and so earnest that he couldnāt lie if he wanted to. Eddie is a lot of things, but heās not a snitch or an idiot, and he knows when to keep silent about something. No one else needs to know, it could be bad if anyone else did know, and therefore this will stay between the two of them. ]
But, uh, I suggest parking elsewhere next time. Pretty sure most noise complaint visits donāt take this long and we wouldnāt want to disappoint the neighbors when you donāt haul me out of here in cuffs, would we?
[ Heās loathe to leave the warmth of this moment, but it has to be done. With a sigh and a grimace, he finally pulls himself off of Gator, grumbling something about his inability to walk. He manages just fine, though, and vaguely gestures for Gator to follow as he slips into the tiny bathroom. Itās cramped and outdated, the same as the rest of the house, but itās enough to get the job done.
Eddie reaches into the shower and turns the knob all the way to the right to get the water running. Shitty pipes mean a short but frustrating wait for hot water, and Eddie takes the spare moment to peer into the mirror over the sink, brushing his hair to the side to gently press his fingertips to the dark scattering of bruises forming on his throat. Itās kind of impressive work, really, and heās not entirely sure how he plans on hiding it. He may have to lie and say he was in a particularly nasty fight. ]
Jesus Christ. Couldnāt have mauled me a bit more? Not sure I look enough like a dalmatian.
[ they're still kissing, and gator feels oddly content with it. his lips are soft, sweet, tasting of weed and beer and himself. he angles his chin to devour eddie's neck again, licking over one of the bruises. sure, it's anxiety, it's always anxiety, but roy tillman finding out that gator's in the arms of another man - especially the little burnout from the trailer park - gator swallows, suddenly stone-cold sober. he leans his head back, and the look in his eyes indicates that he's coming back to the surface. ]
I could haul your ass outta here if it helps you feel better, but I ain't gonna.
[ eddie has fair points, and gator knows better. he shouldn't have parked outside, he shouldn't have stayed this long. he doesn't regret the sex, not at all, never would - but he feels a cold stone of worry flick around his insides. when eddie leads him to the shower, though, he wraps his arms around him from behind. he kisses the crook of his neck, strong and solid as he steps eddie into the water with him. it's warm, finally, and gator turns eddie toward him slowly. ]
This ain't gonna be nothin' but this.
[ he grasps eddie's cock in his hand, giving it a stroke. he takes it away, swallowing. he's tempted again, despite only fucking minutes ago. he breathes heavy, and he knows what he wants. he reaches past eddie to pick up a washcloth, then the soap. he looks into eddie's eyes, searching, before he lathers up the cloth and begins to wash his chest. ]
We can't do nothin' else, you got me? Just gonna be fuckin'.
[ eddie mentions the marks, and gator's eyes lighten up, that cruel streak hitting the waves. he runs his soapy fingers down one of them, caressing. he's admiring his violent work, though the violence came in the urge. he leans down, kissing eddie just slightly at the corner of his mouth. ]
Don't act like you don't want more, baby. I might leave one on your ass.
[ Not being hauled out of here in cuffs is definitely the cherry on top. He knows that the neighbors are going to gossip, but heās not too worried. Their assumptions are just going to be wrong or unfounded, as they always are. Everyone assumes they know what Eddie gets up to, but theyāre often wildly off base (the rumors about satanism or human sacrifice) or lacking in any concrete proof. Everyone knows he sells, but no one has ever been able to put a real pin in it, nor will they ever so long as his clientele remain silent. To the world outside, thereās absolutely no proof that this is anything more than a noise complaint run a little too long.
Heās grateful for the rush of warm water as he steps backward into it, grateful for the continued kisses that keep that high going just a little longer. He sighs, his eyelids fluttering shut as Gatorās hand falls on him and another wave of desire washes over him. Itās damn near impossible not to give in, but heās sore and exhausted and figures it would be in his best interest to exercise some level of self restraint. At least while he still has the ability to. ]
I really want to, man, butā¦Iām also pretty sure you just fucked out a piece of my soul and Iām really gonna need a lot longer than two minutes to recover from all that, soā¦
[ Theyāre already in terribly close quarters, but Eddie drifts closer still, the scent of soap on his tongue as he leans in to mouth at Gatorās jaw and snakes a hand between the two of the and drags his thin fingers along the length of Gatorās cock. Itās a light, meandering sort of touch, little more than a graze, more teasing than not, but he makes I known that he would go for a second round if he could. ]
But, uhā¦I get you. Absolutely.
[ And why should it ever be anything else? Eddie isnāt even sure he particularly likes this man, even if he has seen a couple unexpected flickers of humanity in him this evening. And even if he is unfairly handsome. It doesnāt change the fact that heās a cop, or the fact that he has a cruel streak a mile wide. No, he doesnāt foresee any possible risk of this becoming anything more than this fucked up little physical bond theyāve formed tonight. Wouldnāt that be a cold day in hell?
The sparkle in his eye and the smirk threatening to invade the softness of his features imply he has more to say, though, and when has he ever avoided a quip? ]
Just wondering if youāre telling me that for my sake or your own.
[ Another kiss, another touch, and a mumble against his skin: ]
[ the shower is small, cramped, barely carrying both of their weight - but gator keeps eddie close. his body heat, the warmth of the water, it makes gator's already relaxed muscles loosen the last bit of tension carried deep. he lowers his head, slicked hair falling in his eyes as he closes them and spits water, hand coming up to sop it all back. he continues to wash eddie, hips only jumping slightly at his touch. he kisses his forehead, muttering something under his breath that might sound like - ]
Fuckin' tease.
[ a smirk stretches his mouth, and he grasps the washcloth, taking it to his chest next. he soaps himself up, leaning to give eddie another kiss. he doesn't feel any hatred in this moment - there is no resentment, no pain of the cold, no bitterness of the tillman boot. while that's mostly due to a great lay and substances, gator's docile behavior never lasts too long. at his base, he is an animal, grown angry and full of rage. he has the ranch to thank for that, as well as the edge of a father's knife. gator pulls eddie close and mouths at him, soap bubbling up between them. ]
Let me wash your back.
[ he parts from eddie enough to soap the washcloth up again, rolling it between his large palms. he doesn't know why his irritation at himself has come out as softness, but there they are, taking a shower after fucking on a flimsy couch. it's not the night gator expected, definitely up to this moment and what he guesses is beyond. the secret will have to remain that way, but he knows not to say a fucking word. gator's proclivities are known in whispers, but never full-on accusations. the truth of it is that he likes eddie enough to fuck him, but that doesn't mean he won't put on a show if push comes to shove via the law of the tillman land. ]
It's for both our fuckin' sakes. C'mere.
[ rolling the washcloth down eddie's spine, he strokes in circles. he has to leave after this, probably, to keep the temptation down. if he had it his way, they'd be up and down like this all night, but there are limits. he can't leave just yet, still a three-shades to the wind kind of situation, but he's not going to fuck eddie again. he can't. ]
[ Eddie chuckles, ears just barely picking up on that mumble through the sound of the rushing water. ]
Yeah well, excuse me for needing to retain some level of mobility below the waist in the morning. Donāt you need to think about getting going anyway?
[ Thereās no real urgency in his voice, and he certainly isnāt trying to speed him along. He knows that the effect of the substances havenāt quite worn off yet, and heās not particularly concerned about company showing up unannouncedānot when heās perfectly capable of ignoring any unwelcome knocking at the door, but the squad car parked outside and the thought of how long itās been there does stir a little anxiety, whether he thinks the neighbors will be able to work it out or not.
At another time, that flicker of anxiety might grow into more. Heās not a brave man; it would be so easy for him to grow flighty and scared and try to put an end to this right here and now, but that isnāt what happens. Lucky for both of them, that anxiety is immediately quashed beneath warm water and shockingly gentle hands working their way along his spine. ]
What a service.
[ He sighs, content in the softness of this moment despite knowing well that this wonāt last for long. Itās already gone on for far longer than expected, but heāll take what he can get while he can. It certainly makes him like Gator much more.
He twist in his arms to peer at him yet again, giving him a little nudge. ]
āKay. Turn around. Let me return the favor.
[ Literally you wash my back, Iāll wash yours. ]
[ gator smirks against eddie's skin, kissing his shoulder as he soaps him up. he scrubs him clean gently, peppering his lips across his back. he doesn't know why he's decided to be so kind tonight - but as he closes his eyes and takes in a breath of the steam, he can tell that he's still very intoxicated. fucked up, truth be told, but maybe that'll take the edge off of this in the morning. he doesn't normally get hungover, not too much, but tonight's activities make him feel as if he'll feel something after he sleeps. regret, maybe. maybe not. when eddie speaks of him going, gator's lip curls, and he knows. ]
Yeah, I do. I can't stay here all night, now can I?
[ no urgency, but gator gets it. the suv has been parked outside for quite a while at this point, and while people always whisper - gator clears his throat, trying to sober himself enough to not fuck any of this up. yeah, he came inside of the local criminal burnout, and it was so good he wants more, but he also knows the law of the land. he has to leave, maybe drive down to the quarry and sleep it off for a minute. anxiety rolls down his spine, but when eddie asks to return the favor, gator smirks again. ]
Try to keep your hands off my ass.
[ he turns, slow, reaching for one of the walls as he stands. he lowers his head, sopping hair falling against his face as he waits for it. the warmth, eddie's hands. he can't believe this is happening, not really, so he knows he'll have to keep eddie at arm's length. sex is sex, but emotions - gator doesn't get along with his on the best of days. this can't happen, and he knows it. working his body over isn't the same thing. it never will be. ]
Nope. Cute that youāre under the impression Iād invite you to, though.
[ His tone and grin indicate a joke, but staying truly isnāt an option. It was never an option, and itās never going to be an option. Despite their alcohol and weed addled minds, they both seem to have arrived at the same conclusion about this situation. They both recognize the risks and the type of bad news it could spell if this little āā were found out by the wrong person. They donāt need to be feeling brave or taking chances here, and this doesnāt need to be a complicated situation.
But itās kind of already more complicated than Eddie is giving it credit for. If heād expected anything at all, it was a quick fuck-and-go, because thatās the type of behavior itās easy to associate with Gator Tillman. Never in a million years did he expect any form of aftercare, any tenderness or sweetness, let alone the two of them pressed close in a small shower washing one anotherās backs. Maybe he can thank the weed, but heās still not sure what to do with this information. Itās novel enough at the moment, but if it becomes a common occurrence, there may well come a time where, no matter what he says, Eddieās feelings could shift and he wonāt want him to leave. And thenā¦well, that would be an enormous problem for everyone involved.
For now, though? For now, thatās not even a seed of worry in the back of his mind. Itās fine. Itās a nice bonus, and it doesnāt have to mean anything because it doesnāt. ]
Tell me about it, man. But, uh, Iām a perfect angel, soā¦
[ He says as if he didnāt just prove himself the complete opposite only minutes ago. He does keep to his word, though. As he snatches the soaped up washcloth for his own and works it in careful circles along Gatorās spine, his hands donāt wander too far. One does, however, come to rest on his hip, squeezing slightly as he drops kisses along his shoulders. ]
[ cute. gator smirks at that, allowing eddie to wash him gently. he's still unsure of so many things, but this feels good, so good that he melts into the touch. he's not used to it - being cared for, this kind of gentleness. it almost wants to make him flinch, almost wants to make him get dressed and storm out. that stab of anxiety threatens to pierce the veil of substance-induced haze. he closes his eyes, leaning his arms against the shower wall, silent. he's thinking, and thinking deeply, wondering what exactly would happen if his father found out. a barbaric man, a true bastard, a hard man for hard times.
gator respects his father, much more than anyone he has surrounding him. his devotion is buried deep within like bodies on the ranch. the fixing place. how many people has gator killed? just because his father said so? would he be next after this? his brows knit, and when eddie puts his hand on his hip - gator doesn't want it to feel so nice, but it does. enough for gator to try to catch his breath. he looks over his shoulder at eddie, tattooed arms still stretched out, water running over his eyelashes. it's a blur, but he can make out eddie, can make out the look on his face. this is bad.
gator turns, taking the washcloth and eddie's waist, both hands occupied. he leans and kisses eddie - really kisses him - mouth open and still choking on secrets. what if eddie found out about the deaths? would he be scared? would it matter? gator is the definition of bad, of the seed that grows rotten without tending. he's wild, an animal, his mind a trap of violence and rage. but in this moment, he kisses eddie with all he has. he bites his bottom lip, pulling it, sucking on the edge before he lets it go. ]
I gotta go.
[ leaning past eddie to turn off the water, they stare at each other, gator's eyes boring. he parts from eddie to open the curtain, then steps out, soaking. he grabs a threadbare towel, rubbing himself down. he has to get out of here, fucked up or not. he'll meander to the nearest gas station, pick up a six pack, then take it home to get closer to the darkness. holed up in his room, the cold of the night biting into him as he drinks alone. that's more like it. he glances at eddie, and there isn't true hatred in his gaze, but there's something keeping him from kissing him again. the need to flee, to retreat. ]
[ The fact of the matter is that Eddie has some idea of what heās gotten himself into. Though he may not know the whole of it, he still understands that the man heās dealing with is genuinely dangerous and at least capable of killing. Whether or not he actually has is unknown to him, but heās seen the storm brewing behind Gatorās eyes on more than one occasion, and heās often wondered if, or rather when he might be the next to find Gatorās hands around his throat.
Because Eddie has been known to poke the bear. Cops are easy to mess with, especially the specific breed of small town cop heās the most familiar with. The ones who will haul him downtown only to release him an hour later because they never find anything and fail to follow up on some pretty obvious leads. Gator isnāt that breed of cop. Heās something darker all together, but Eddie has still never been able to help himself, and the two of them managed to entwine themselves together long before this eveningās events. Eddie sells, Gator uses, and neither can out the other without sacrificing themself as well. Theyāve just twisted themselves more tightly together now, adding a second layer to this whole fucked up ordeal.
Eddie is quite certain heāll be able to untangle himself from Gator, though, if it should come to that. Heās sure heāll know when to pull back before he digs too deep of a hole for himself. Heās sure, and he can only hope that heās not wrong, because that kiss sets him on fire, more so than all the ones before it. Itās intense and leaves him wanting for more of something that he knows he canāt have right now. Itās enough to nearly makes him doubt his ability or desire to ever put an end to this. Fuck, this is bad, this is terrifying, actually, and that seed of doubt threatens to germinate once moreā
But they part, and just like that, their time is up, and worrying isnāt worth the effort. Eddie reaches for a towel to begin squeezing the water from his dripping hair, wraps the towel around his waist, and carefully slips by the other man to collect fresh clothing from his chaotic dragonās hoard of a bedroom. ]
Iām not stopping you, man.
[ And he doesnāt. He doesnāt try to reach for him, utters no word to slow him, and when they separate, he makes no move to close the space between them once more. He gets it. Gator has already stayed longer than intended. Any longer and it will look even more suspicious than it already does. They both know that this is how it needs to be.
He emerges moments later, right back in his typical band t-shirt uniform, and leans against the door frame to eye him, arms crossed and head tilted, expression unreadable despite the smile on his mouth. ]
[ entwine and untangle. gator knows that if push comes to shove, he'll haul eddie in, but that's never the case in stark county. roy allows eddie to sell just as he allows gator to use. not a single breath in this fucking county isn't accounted for by roy himself, including all the huffing and puffing they were doing on the couch not an hour ago.
it was good, gator knows that, and he also knows he'll be back for more of it. drugs, sex, rock and roll. the led zeppelin record is skipping in the living room, long since forgotten by both of them in their sex-induced shower. gator gazes at eddie before he slicks his hair back with his hands. he's still wet, but he'll be dry by the time he pulls up at the ranch. that's what matters here. ]
I ain't sayin' you are.
[ gator throws eddie a sarcastic smile, closed-lipped, before he reaches down for his clothes. he hitches his pants up moments later, gun on his thigh as he adjusts his belt. boots are on, ballcap's back on, and he looks good as new. the stink of sex has cleared out, nothing but remnants of weed and beer where a hard fuck happened. gator licks his lips, looking down at the couch, but he doesn't let himself get too far drawn into it. not here, not now. instead, he merely walks up to eddie and looks at him - really looks at him, right down his nose - before he backs off and lifts both hands. ]
Next time, burnout. Don't let me see your ass haulin' around or I'll ticket you.
[ opening the door to the trailer, gator steps out into the cold bite of the night. kevlar graces his chest as he turns toward the entrance, doorknob in his hand. he stares at eddie, then winks at him. ]
That bullshit better fuckin' stay down after this, alright, Munson? Don't make me come back out here tonight! You ain't gonna like it if I do!
[ and slam goes the door, gator walking back out into the night. ]
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no subject
You sound like a man obsessed already, sweetheart. A small time dealer really has you this hot and bothered?
[ His accusation comes paired with a smirk and a dark chuckle as he rests his cheek against Gatorās thigh and peers up at him with those wide eyes, looking almost sweet of a moment. He thinks he could try it, though. Take that wad of cash and see how far he can coast before it all runs dry and he has to turn back or figure out something else. There really isnāt much for him to lose at this point, and the thought of of finally getting out is appealing in and of itself, but what really puts it over the edge is the tempting threat of being chased. Itās about seven different shades of fucked up how readily he think heād welcome it and how deeply he wants to challenge him on it just to give him a nudge in the right direction. Because the cruel, hard look in his eyes and the way he lifts Eddieās chin to meet his gazeāEddie believes heād do it, given enough encouragement.
All Eddie was really aiming for tonight was one less noise complaint on his record and the police off his back for a single evening. Heād wanted Gator Tillman in and out of his home as quickly as possible, but now things have twisted rather dramatically and here he is on his knees, palming himself while he willingly sucks that very same man off. Even worse, Eddie is sure heāll do just about anything to chase this high again when itās all over. He canāt phrase why and heās not even sure he wants to understand what was unlocked in him tonight. All he can do is acknowledge that the two of them have walked hand in hand into the lionās den and the exit has been sealed. They are both well and truly, completely and utterly fucked.
And the worst part is just how fine he is with that. He feels fully insane. ]
Butā
[ He begins, raising his head. He licks his lips and chooses to take pity on him, repositioning to take him in his mouth once more. He wants so badly to hear him hiss and moan again, and he scrapes his short nails down his thigh, leaving white marks as he swirls his tongue over the tip, eye contact still unbroken. ]
Iād really like to see you try.
[ There it is. A challenge, emphasis on the really, clearly containing more than a crumb of truth. Eddie would very much like to see him try. ]
no subject
You think I won't chase your ass down? Ain't nothin' I can't do. Is that it?
[ when eddie takes mercy and slips the head of gator's cock back into his mouth, gator pants, the sensation of eddie's nails sending him over the edge. he rocks his hips, hand now in eddie's hair as he rides it out. again, he pulls off, and gator groans, so frustrated that he swallows thickly. he wants to come. he knows he's eddie's plaything for now, and that both turns him on and makes him incredibly angry. what about this little burnout does it for him? those eyes, maybe. that ass in those jeans, again, maybe. gator grabs a handful of eddie's hair, ripping his head back, before he leans down and kisses him. he can taste himself, taste cock, but that doesn't bother him, never has. ]
What'cha want, huh? Me to admit somethin'? You think I won't tax that ass like it owes me money? You think I won't ruin you for anyone else?
[ he backs away, hand still in eddie's hair, and he stares down at him. cold, calculating, but glassy-eyed from lust and substances. he takes in a breath, steadying. ]
Enough suckin'. Go get the lube.
no subject
The noise he emits when his hair is given a strong tug is interestingāa soft yelp mixed with a moan, all smothered in an instant beneath that kiss. He all but melts into it and swears quietly when they part. ]
Jesus Christ. [ He rolls his head backward into Gatorās palm, buying a moment to catch his breath by staring up into his cold gaze. ] Putting words in my mouth. Pretty sure I only said Iād like to see you try, not that I didn't think you could.
[ Then Eddieās gaze drops downward, flicks upward, downward, then up again. He eyes Gator doubtfully, scrunches up his face and tilts his head one way, then the other, and itās more than clear that heās trying to figure out how all of that could possibly fit inside of him. But the scales tip rather quickly in favor of his want and desire, and he literally shrugs his concerns off, clambers to his feet, and slips through the door of one incredibly messy bedroom.
The sounds of opening and closing drawers, murmured swears and rusting come from within and moments later, Eddie makes his triumphant return, bottle in hand and stripped down to just torn denim and skin. Thereās really nothing particularly impressive or remarkable about what lies beneath his uniform of faded band tees, and heās well aware of that fact. Heās still very much a skinny burnout who probably canāt afford to miss a meal, more sinew and poorly etched tattoos than muscle, but he isnāt lacking in an ounce of confidence as he approaches Gator once more.
Without missing a beat, he drops the bottle onto the couch, then drops himself down onto Gatorās lap to straddle him. He buries his fingers deep into the gel-slicked hair and crowds in painfully close to kiss him like his very life depends on it. Slow, deep, and open mouthed, pouring every ounce of his longing and hunger into it, teeth and tongue and the taste of weed and beer.
Pulling back slightly, he continues in a murmur: ]
But I can guarantee you itās not gonna be you who ruins me for anyone else.
[ He very much could, likely will, probably already has considering how much Eddie wants this. But if this is what fate has in store for him, he plans on dragging Gator down with him. Make him just as desperate and needy and addicted as Eddie already is so they can keep one another company in this personal hell theyāve just created.
His voice is low and touched with gravel as he leans in close, breath hot against Gatorās ear, teeth just scraping against the shell of it. ]
Itās gonna be me who ruins anyone else for you, deputy. No one else is gonna do it for you after this.
no subject
it seems comical, near-funny, but there's too much lust between them that gator denies the idea that this might be something he won't come back from. if the sex is good, and gator predicts it will be, maybe he'll be the one coming back like an addict ready for the biggest hit imaginable. he wants to overdose on eddie's couch like this, thrusting up into him and coming so hard he'll taste it.
eddie shrugs, leaves the room, and gator peels out of his t-shirt, tossing it to the side. he works the cammo pants down, gun still in its holster, and around his ankles. he takes his cock in his hand, working it, keeping stiff.
he grunts, moan desperate to escape, but he knows that he won't come like this. he can't. it's not enough. still palming himself, eddie re-enters the room shirtless. he's a streak of nothing, skinny and hungry, but gator's starving mouth devours his all the same. his hands travel over eddie's back as they kiss, then over tattoos and his abdomen, rubbing down between his legs. his cock is hard, and gator grunts, knowing that soon he'll jerk it to leaking. ]
Is that right?
[ his words cause gator to shiver, eyes fluttering closed as eddie mouths at his ear. a sensitive spot, gator's cock twitching at the head. his hips shift against eddie's, their pelvises grinding, shaft to shaft. gator moans, lifting eddie effortlessly and bringing him closer. he rips down the rest of the denim, hands on eddie's ass, kneading. ]
That's it, baby. Want me to stretch you out first, huh? How much can you take?
[ it's almost as if he cares - almost. he doesn't want to hurt eddie that badly, does he? the urge to pin him to the floor and fuck him into oblivion like he wants to is tempting, caring about his own pleasure. however, he doesn't, hand around eddie to stroke him. it's slow and teasing, free fingers at eddie's hole. he touches it, rings around the rim, eyes on eddie's all the same. dark, curious, dangerous. ]
Look at it.
[ he grabs eddie's chin, jerking his head down, but gently. he's touching eddie still, lazy jerks, his own cock rubbing against his. ]
Doesn't that make you wanna fuck?
no subject
Maybe heāll have it in him to laugh about it later, because the shift this night took really is all kinds of hilarious. Or maybe heāll just crave it until it happens again, which it inevitably will. Theyāve well established that, even if neither has has properly admitted it. Eddieās reaction serves as truth enough, though. The way his breath hitches in his throat and he swears airily, head tipping to the side, his eyelids fluttering shut as his fingers scrape and grip at any skin they can dig into. The way he bites his lip and shifts, greedily trying to chase the wave of pleasure. And, of course, the fact that he does absolutely nothing to stop him or push him away. ]
Shit, I take it back. That is pretty gentleman behavior of you.
[ Because it really is a level ofā¦maybe care isnāt the correct word, but consideration that he didnāt expect from Gator Tillman, even after his opinion of the man has been significantly twisted already. Heās not expecting a particularly large amount of tenderness, but heās willing to do just about anything to chase this high, and heās certainly not put off now.
He huffs out a soft laugh against Gatorās hand, seriously considers saying something smart like not really or I donāt know, roll for initiative first just to fuck with him, but he thinks better of it. When youāre naked in another manās lap and his hand is around your cock, pretense becomes just a little ridiculous, even if it is for the sake of a joke.
So he sheds pretense entirely and makes things quite clear when he lifts his eyes to that dark, dangerous gaze, tilts his head, and responds with a sly smile, knowing full well that he isn't the only one who desperately wants this. ]
Be my guest, loverboy. Iām all yours.
no subject
gator pumps his fingers, not too fast, but enough to begin to stretch the muscle. he bites his lip, free hand now back on he and eddie, stroking together. wet, slick sounds make gator gasp, his head leaned back against the sofa's headrest as he eyes eddie's face. all of those expressions, all of that pleasure. he grabs eddie's hip, pulling him forward and into another hot, hard kiss. he mouths at eddie's bottom lip. ]
Mmhm, maybe don't judge a book by it's fuckin' cover. Open up real wide for me, baby boy. Let me feel it.
[ he can see a twist of the light in eddie's eyes, as if he's about to challenge him. gator bites eddie's chin, a grin around the skin, before he leans off and kisses him again, again, again. his fingers slide in and out, quicker, breath hot on eddie's neck. ]
C'mon, say it. I can see that smartass mind flippin' around.
[ gator's lips part in a dark, breathless chuckle. he holds eddie onto him, blunt cockhead rubbing against his still, and he can't take it. he'll need him soon, really soon, but first - gator needs to be pushed over the edge. he wants eddie to smart off, to piss him off, to say something eddie enough to get his blood boiling. call it gator's sick foreplay, or call it the urge to be challenged. ]
I ain't givin' you none 'til you do.
no subject
His vision swims as he digs his nails into flesh, mouth falling open in a gasp as they kiss again, and again, and again. Itās not enough. Heās a man starved, and he tries his hardest to chase down one more kiss despite already being so overtaken by pleasure he could die from it.
Then the entire thing is denied, put on a brief pause because Eddie even thought about trying to fuck with him, and since when is Gator Tillman a mind reader? He groans loudly, partially out of arousal and partially out of frustration. ]
That just means you aināt getting none til I do. Funny how that works, huh?
[ He talks a big talk, mimics Gatorās lingo just for an added layer of impudence. And ordinarily heād be perfectly happy to pull back entirely, to tease, to keep this dance going until it drives Gator right to the edge of insanity, but that just isnāt in the cards tonight. Call him dramatic, but Eddie isnāt sure heāll survive if they donāt see this through, not when heās coming apart at the seams as they speak. ]
I was just thinkingā
[ His head lolls backwards, baring the column of his throat as he half chuckles, half huffs angrily. ]
That given our current position? It was a stupid question to ask, deputy.
[ Just as quickly, his chuckle snaps into a soft whine of oh, fuck, his head dropping low and a curtain of hair falling across his face as he rocks back onto Gatorās hand. In this state, he struggles to keep his usual string of jokes and smartass banter going, and he stutters in an attempt to continue. ]
But I am way too close and if you donāt shut up and get to defiling me, this is gonna be over real quick.
no subject
Defilin'... that what you like to call it, darlin'?
[ gator's words are cut while he moans, lazy syllables in and out of needy sighs. he fucks eddie like he means it, and he does, leaning back to watch as he bounces him into his lap. his thumbs dig into eddie's hipbones, and gator bites his lip, eyes roving over eddie as if he's a man lost, a man that needs to eat him whole. he feels good, almost too good, gator's cockhead tapping his prostate with precision as he angles his hips to catch more of it. ]
You're so fuckin' hard, babydoll, let me help -
[ gator raises his hand and spits in it, then wraps his palm around eddie, pulling, stroking. he matches his own pace, despite his hips jumping quicker. he grunts, looking up at eddie as if this isn't going to be the last time, and they both know it. not when eddie is this tight and feels so good. he yanks his hair back, sitting up again, cock driving into eddie shallowly as he huffs against his mouth. ]
That's it, fuck, yeah.
no subject
But itās all to be expected. If he wanted tenderness, Gator is the very last person heād be doing this with. This is a quiet desire thatās worked its way up to a mighty need at any cost. Addiction at its finest; anything for a hit, no matter how quick or dirty. And maybe that spark wasnāt alway there, but there was an ember, something so small and insignificant that it could be extinguished with a single breathāor, under different circumstances, stoked into a roaring flame. The latter clearly where theyāve ended up, and it just seems like the natural conclusion for their little dance. The time spent circling one another, closing in little by little, they were alway going to collide eventually, one way or another.
But after that awkward start, Eddie finds a rhythm to match Gatorās, and heās not quiet. A never-ending stream of moans, sighs, and breathless fuck, yeses and please, please, pleases tumbles from his lips as he moves his hips in tandem with Gatorās thrusts. Itās the most polite heās ever been, really.
He accuses Gator of being obsessed, but Eddie is no better. As enraptured as he is and as incredible as heās feeling, he refuses to let his eyes shut. Instead, he keeps his gaze fixed on Gator whenever he can, dark and intense as ever, drinking in every shift in expression and hitch in his breath, hoping to hold him there for as long as possible. ]
Iām soāIām so fucking close.
[ He rasps and chuckles breathlessly, and he thinks about how much he would love to draw this out even more, love to figure out how much it takes to make this man fucking beg for more, but Eddieās already been thoroughly unravelled and itās just a little too late for that now. He silently vows that next time, he will. Next timeāitās an inevitability now, isnāt it?
He twists away from the grip on his hair, just enough to kiss him once more, hard enough to bruise. ]
You gonna get me there, sweetheart? Bet you can't.
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he pulls him closer, chest to chest, the way the couch groans underneath them as if it's about to break - it pushes gator further toward the edge, his cock twitching inside of eddie as he begins to leak. he kisses down eddie's chin, then his jawline, biting at it, too. he wants to swallow him whole, wants to take him and never let him go. this, this, this.
with another groan, he tears his head away from eddie's neck, tongue licking upward to the shell of his ear. he grunts again, the thrusts becoming harder, deeper. gator pants, and a whine exits, enough for him to look almost helpless. his mouth parts, wet, shiny, each moan more and more desperate. ]
That's it, baby. Don't think I can fuck you good?
[ his hand moves faster, mouth on eddie's again. he kisses him with fire - passion and pain and tearing eddie up from the inside. his pelvis jerks wildly, and as he leans back onto the cushions, his back arches. he pants louder, looking at eddie, into his eyes, before he spits in his hand again. he coaxes precome from eddie's slit with two fingers, groaning at the sight of it. ]
C'mon, let me see that spunk. Come all over me. I fuckin' need it.
[ his eyelids flutter, and another moan crawls from deep, coming out harsh and so close - ]
Fuck, I'm gonna come inside.
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Fuckā [ He shakes his head, another chuckle edging into his breath, like he just canāt help but laugh his way through this. Itās all so ridiculous, itās all just so much, Gator threatening to finish inside of him while the couch creaks dangerously beneath them, and he just hopes this doesnāt result in anything that he needs to awkwardly explain away later. ] Donāt care. Do it. Fucking need you to do it, okay?
[ He should give more of a shit, there should be more caution than heās actually putting in here, but itās too late for all of that. A problem for future Eddie to dwell on. Preset Eddie is desperate and urgent as the heat builds, and itās all so fucking fast but absolutely incredible as Eddie fights to close any space that remains between them. He presses close, chest to chest, thigh to thigh, and comes with his face in the crook of Gatorās neck, with a shudder and a ragged groan. ]
Jesus fucking Christā
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That's it, baby. Was it good?
[ he kisses eddie's forehead, brushing wild hair away from it. sweat and come fill the room with the stink of sex, lubricant sticky on their thighs. gator leans his head back, eyes closed, hands now resting on either side of eddie's hips. they stay like this for a moment, gator catching his breath, still half-hard. he's inside, settled, the white of it leaking onto both of them. it's messy, nasty, but gator feels satisfied... for the moment. he knows that he'll be back for this, he'll be back to fuck and smoke and fuck and smoke - but for the while, this is enough. ]
Don't tell anyone about this shit.
[ that should be evident, but the way he's stroking eddie's spine now is downright soft. he hates himself for it, but eddie's just about left him in a coma. that deserves some kindness, he figures, the skinny streak of nothing in his arms warm and soft and needed after. he kisses eddie's cheek, then leans his head back again, coated in both of them. ]
My daddy'll kill us both.
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With absolutely no regard for the mess between them, he slumps against Gator like a rag doll and just stays there for a moment, quiet as his heartbeat and breath match the pace of Gatorāsāone beat, two, three, fourā¦Itās the soft aftermath that pulls him back down to earth, the gentle touch on his spine so foreign from these particular hands that it slowly begins pulling on his tether, drawing him out of his stupor. Slowly, his raises his head, blinking in the dim light. ]
And here I was so eager to let everyone know Iām a cop fucker.
[ Thereās no heat to it, and he mumbles, deadpan, still coming out of his haze. He doesnāt particularly care about Tillman Sr. right now, even if he is significantly more intimidating than his son. Heās not here, and there were never any plans to utter a single word about this to anyone. Eddie doesnāt feel a lot of shame aboutā¦well, anything, to be perfectly honest, but heās not stupid. There are some things best kept quiet, and this is certainly one of them. ]
Donāt worry about it, ākay?
[ He brushes the askew hair back and kisses him once, impossibly sweet. ]
Iām not gonna say shit.
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Cop fucker, yeah, you sure are.
[ a grin, a little bounce of his lap to make sure eddie knows he's still inside him. he's not mean, he's not cruel, he's simply existing at the arms of something he's feeling attracted to. it's a warmth, and he hates it just as much as he wants to burn himself against it. he should be feeling nausea and anxiety and regret and pain - but here he is, eddie munson on his lap, their naked bodies fitting so fucking perfectly. ]
I ain't gonna so long as -
[ they're kissing, and gator groans again, cupping eddie's face by his cheeks and mouthing at him. ]
- we just keep it a fuckin' secret. He ain't gotta know. This is just you and me. It ain't gotta make it around town.
[ gator stares at eddie, searching his eyes with his own. they're sharper now, more in-focus. he tilts his head, swallowing stiffly, then releases his gentle hold. he leans back against the cushions, hand on eddie's hip. they're still naked and entangled, but gator begins to feel the stickiness of it all. he winces, then gazes up at eddie with a slight pout. ]
Showerin' time.
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[ Maybe itās just the afterglow and the fact that heās feeling satisfied and warm and content, maybe itās the fact that every kiss is painfully sweet and gentle and it takes everything for him to not just melt into each one, but he feels the need to soothe that worry. Maybe an anxious man just has the innate ability to recognize anxiety, no matter how deeply buried it may be. He murmurs against Gatorās mouth as they kiss, voice soft: ]
Heās not gonna know. No oneās gonna know. Iām not exactly in the business of oversharing, soā¦
[ His gaze is so open and so earnest that he couldnāt lie if he wanted to. Eddie is a lot of things, but heās not a snitch or an idiot, and he knows when to keep silent about something. No one else needs to know, it could be bad if anyone else did know, and therefore this will stay between the two of them. ]
But, uh, I suggest parking elsewhere next time. Pretty sure most noise complaint visits donāt take this long and we wouldnāt want to disappoint the neighbors when you donāt haul me out of here in cuffs, would we?
[ Heās loathe to leave the warmth of this moment, but it has to be done. With a sigh and a grimace, he finally pulls himself off of Gator, grumbling something about his inability to walk. He manages just fine, though, and vaguely gestures for Gator to follow as he slips into the tiny bathroom. Itās cramped and outdated, the same as the rest of the house, but itās enough to get the job done.
Eddie reaches into the shower and turns the knob all the way to the right to get the water running. Shitty pipes mean a short but frustrating wait for hot water, and Eddie takes the spare moment to peer into the mirror over the sink, brushing his hair to the side to gently press his fingertips to the dark scattering of bruises forming on his throat. Itās kind of impressive work, really, and heās not entirely sure how he plans on hiding it. He may have to lie and say he was in a particularly nasty fight. ]
Jesus Christ. Couldnāt have mauled me a bit more? Not sure I look enough like a dalmatian.
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I could haul your ass outta here if it helps you feel better, but I ain't gonna.
[ eddie has fair points, and gator knows better. he shouldn't have parked outside, he shouldn't have stayed this long. he doesn't regret the sex, not at all, never would - but he feels a cold stone of worry flick around his insides. when eddie leads him to the shower, though, he wraps his arms around him from behind. he kisses the crook of his neck, strong and solid as he steps eddie into the water with him. it's warm, finally, and gator turns eddie toward him slowly. ]
This ain't gonna be nothin' but this.
[ he grasps eddie's cock in his hand, giving it a stroke. he takes it away, swallowing. he's tempted again, despite only fucking minutes ago. he breathes heavy, and he knows what he wants. he reaches past eddie to pick up a washcloth, then the soap. he looks into eddie's eyes, searching, before he lathers up the cloth and begins to wash his chest. ]
We can't do nothin' else, you got me? Just gonna be fuckin'.
[ eddie mentions the marks, and gator's eyes lighten up, that cruel streak hitting the waves. he runs his soapy fingers down one of them, caressing. he's admiring his violent work, though the violence came in the urge. he leans down, kissing eddie just slightly at the corner of his mouth. ]
Don't act like you don't want more, baby. I might leave one on your ass.
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Heās grateful for the rush of warm water as he steps backward into it, grateful for the continued kisses that keep that high going just a little longer. He sighs, his eyelids fluttering shut as Gatorās hand falls on him and another wave of desire washes over him. Itās damn near impossible not to give in, but heās sore and exhausted and figures it would be in his best interest to exercise some level of self restraint. At least while he still has the ability to. ]
I really want to, man, butā¦Iām also pretty sure you just fucked out a piece of my soul and Iām really gonna need a lot longer than two minutes to recover from all that, soā¦
[ Theyāre already in terribly close quarters, but Eddie drifts closer still, the scent of soap on his tongue as he leans in to mouth at Gatorās jaw and snakes a hand between the two of the and drags his thin fingers along the length of Gatorās cock. Itās a light, meandering sort of touch, little more than a graze, more teasing than not, but he makes I known that he would go for a second round if he could. ]
But, uhā¦I get you. Absolutely.
[ And why should it ever be anything else? Eddie isnāt even sure he particularly likes this man, even if he has seen a couple unexpected flickers of humanity in him this evening. And even if he is unfairly handsome. It doesnāt change the fact that heās a cop, or the fact that he has a cruel streak a mile wide. No, he doesnāt foresee any possible risk of this becoming anything more than this fucked up little physical bond theyāve formed tonight. Wouldnāt that be a cold day in hell?
The sparkle in his eye and the smirk threatening to invade the softness of his features imply he has more to say, though, and when has he ever avoided a quip? ]
Just wondering if youāre telling me that for my sake or your own.
[ Another kiss, another touch, and a mumble against his skin: ]
But itās cool. Pretty sure Iāll survive.
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Fuckin' tease.
[ a smirk stretches his mouth, and he grasps the washcloth, taking it to his chest next. he soaps himself up, leaning to give eddie another kiss. he doesn't feel any hatred in this moment - there is no resentment, no pain of the cold, no bitterness of the tillman boot. while that's mostly due to a great lay and substances, gator's docile behavior never lasts too long. at his base, he is an animal, grown angry and full of rage. he has the ranch to thank for that, as well as the edge of a father's knife. gator pulls eddie close and mouths at him, soap bubbling up between them. ]
Let me wash your back.
[ he parts from eddie enough to soap the washcloth up again, rolling it between his large palms. he doesn't know why his irritation at himself has come out as softness, but there they are, taking a shower after fucking on a flimsy couch. it's not the night gator expected, definitely up to this moment and what he guesses is beyond. the secret will have to remain that way, but he knows not to say a fucking word. gator's proclivities are known in whispers, but never full-on accusations. the truth of it is that he likes eddie enough to fuck him, but that doesn't mean he won't put on a show if push comes to shove via the law of the tillman land. ]
It's for both our fuckin' sakes. C'mere.
[ rolling the washcloth down eddie's spine, he strokes in circles. he has to leave after this, probably, to keep the temptation down. if he had it his way, they'd be up and down like this all night, but there are limits. he can't leave just yet, still a three-shades to the wind kind of situation, but he's not going to fuck eddie again. he can't. ]
Yeah... me too.
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Yeah well, excuse me for needing to retain some level of mobility below the waist in the morning. Donāt you need to think about getting going anyway?
[ Thereās no real urgency in his voice, and he certainly isnāt trying to speed him along. He knows that the effect of the substances havenāt quite worn off yet, and heās not particularly concerned about company showing up unannouncedānot when heās perfectly capable of ignoring any unwelcome knocking at the door, but the squad car parked outside and the thought of how long itās been there does stir a little anxiety, whether he thinks the neighbors will be able to work it out or not.
At another time, that flicker of anxiety might grow into more. Heās not a brave man; it would be so easy for him to grow flighty and scared and try to put an end to this right here and now, but that isnāt what happens. Lucky for both of them, that anxiety is immediately quashed beneath warm water and shockingly gentle hands working their way along his spine. ]
What a service.
[ He sighs, content in the softness of this moment despite knowing well that this wonāt last for long. Itās already gone on for far longer than expected, but heāll take what he can get while he can. It certainly makes him like Gator much more.
He twist in his arms to peer at him yet again, giving him a little nudge. ]
āKay. Turn around. Let me return the favor.
[ Literally you wash my back, Iāll wash yours. ]
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Yeah, I do. I can't stay here all night, now can I?
[ no urgency, but gator gets it. the suv has been parked outside for quite a while at this point, and while people always whisper - gator clears his throat, trying to sober himself enough to not fuck any of this up. yeah, he came inside of the local criminal burnout, and it was so good he wants more, but he also knows the law of the land. he has to leave, maybe drive down to the quarry and sleep it off for a minute. anxiety rolls down his spine, but when eddie asks to return the favor, gator smirks again. ]
Try to keep your hands off my ass.
[ he turns, slow, reaching for one of the walls as he stands. he lowers his head, sopping hair falling against his face as he waits for it. the warmth, eddie's hands. he can't believe this is happening, not really, so he knows he'll have to keep eddie at arm's length. sex is sex, but emotions - gator doesn't get along with his on the best of days. this can't happen, and he knows it. working his body over isn't the same thing. it never will be. ]
I know that's a fuckin' temptation.
[ he's only half-joking. ]
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[ His tone and grin indicate a joke, but staying truly isnāt an option. It was never an option, and itās never going to be an option. Despite their alcohol and weed addled minds, they both seem to have arrived at the same conclusion about this situation. They both recognize the risks and the type of bad news it could spell if this little āā were found out by the wrong person. They donāt need to be feeling brave or taking chances here, and this doesnāt need to be a complicated situation.
But itās kind of already more complicated than Eddie is giving it credit for. If heād expected anything at all, it was a quick fuck-and-go, because thatās the type of behavior itās easy to associate with Gator Tillman. Never in a million years did he expect any form of aftercare, any tenderness or sweetness, let alone the two of them pressed close in a small shower washing one anotherās backs. Maybe he can thank the weed, but heās still not sure what to do with this information. Itās novel enough at the moment, but if it becomes a common occurrence, there may well come a time where, no matter what he says, Eddieās feelings could shift and he wonāt want him to leave. And thenā¦well, that would be an enormous problem for everyone involved.
For now, though? For now, thatās not even a seed of worry in the back of his mind. Itās fine. Itās a nice bonus, and it doesnāt have to mean anything because it doesnāt. ]
Tell me about it, man. But, uh, Iām a perfect angel, soā¦
[ He says as if he didnāt just prove himself the complete opposite only minutes ago. He does keep to his word, though. As he snatches the soaped up washcloth for his own and works it in careful circles along Gatorās spine, his hands donāt wander too far. One does, however, come to rest on his hip, squeezing slightly as he drops kisses along his shoulders. ]
See? Totally innocent.
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gator respects his father, much more than anyone he has surrounding him. his devotion is buried deep within like bodies on the ranch. the fixing place. how many people has gator killed? just because his father said so? would he be next after this? his brows knit, and when eddie puts his hand on his hip - gator doesn't want it to feel so nice, but it does. enough for gator to try to catch his breath. he looks over his shoulder at eddie, tattooed arms still stretched out, water running over his eyelashes. it's a blur, but he can make out eddie, can make out the look on his face. this is bad.
gator turns, taking the washcloth and eddie's waist, both hands occupied. he leans and kisses eddie - really kisses him - mouth open and still choking on secrets. what if eddie found out about the deaths? would he be scared? would it matter? gator is the definition of bad, of the seed that grows rotten without tending. he's wild, an animal, his mind a trap of violence and rage. but in this moment, he kisses eddie with all he has. he bites his bottom lip, pulling it, sucking on the edge before he lets it go. ]
I gotta go.
[ leaning past eddie to turn off the water, they stare at each other, gator's eyes boring. he parts from eddie to open the curtain, then steps out, soaking. he grabs a threadbare towel, rubbing himself down. he has to get out of here, fucked up or not. he'll meander to the nearest gas station, pick up a six pack, then take it home to get closer to the darkness. holed up in his room, the cold of the night biting into him as he drinks alone. that's more like it. he glances at eddie, and there isn't true hatred in his gaze, but there's something keeping him from kissing him again. the need to flee, to retreat. ]
I think you know that.
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Because Eddie has been known to poke the bear. Cops are easy to mess with, especially the specific breed of small town cop heās the most familiar with. The ones who will haul him downtown only to release him an hour later because they never find anything and fail to follow up on some pretty obvious leads. Gator isnāt that breed of cop. Heās something darker all together, but Eddie has still never been able to help himself, and the two of them managed to entwine themselves together long before this eveningās events. Eddie sells, Gator uses, and neither can out the other without sacrificing themself as well. Theyāve just twisted themselves more tightly together now, adding a second layer to this whole fucked up ordeal.
Eddie is quite certain heāll be able to untangle himself from Gator, though, if it should come to that. Heās sure heāll know when to pull back before he digs too deep of a hole for himself. Heās sure, and he can only hope that heās not wrong, because that kiss sets him on fire, more so than all the ones before it. Itās intense and leaves him wanting for more of something that he knows he canāt have right now. Itās enough to nearly makes him doubt his ability or desire to ever put an end to this. Fuck, this is bad, this is terrifying, actually, and that seed of doubt threatens to germinate once moreā
But they part, and just like that, their time is up, and worrying isnāt worth the effort. Eddie reaches for a towel to begin squeezing the water from his dripping hair, wraps the towel around his waist, and carefully slips by the other man to collect fresh clothing from his chaotic dragonās hoard of a bedroom. ]
Iām not stopping you, man.
[ And he doesnāt. He doesnāt try to reach for him, utters no word to slow him, and when they separate, he makes no move to close the space between them once more. He gets it. Gator has already stayed longer than intended. Any longer and it will look even more suspicious than it already does. They both know that this is how it needs to be.
He emerges moments later, right back in his typical band t-shirt uniform, and leans against the door frame to eye him, arms crossed and head tilted, expression unreadable despite the smile on his mouth. ]
Iāll see you next time, deputy.
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it was good, gator knows that, and he also knows he'll be back for more of it. drugs, sex, rock and roll. the led zeppelin record is skipping in the living room, long since forgotten by both of them in their sex-induced shower. gator gazes at eddie before he slicks his hair back with his hands. he's still wet, but he'll be dry by the time he pulls up at the ranch. that's what matters here. ]
I ain't sayin' you are.
[ gator throws eddie a sarcastic smile, closed-lipped, before he reaches down for his clothes. he hitches his pants up moments later, gun on his thigh as he adjusts his belt. boots are on, ballcap's back on, and he looks good as new. the stink of sex has cleared out, nothing but remnants of weed and beer where a hard fuck happened. gator licks his lips, looking down at the couch, but he doesn't let himself get too far drawn into it. not here, not now. instead, he merely walks up to eddie and looks at him - really looks at him, right down his nose - before he backs off and lifts both hands. ]
Next time, burnout. Don't let me see your ass haulin' around or I'll ticket you.
[ opening the door to the trailer, gator steps out into the cold bite of the night. kevlar graces his chest as he turns toward the entrance, doorknob in his hand. he stares at eddie, then winks at him. ]
That bullshit better fuckin' stay down after this, alright, Munson? Don't make me come back out here tonight! You ain't gonna like it if I do!
[ and slam goes the door, gator walking back out into the night. ]